BO x one big load of

[I have alot of things to do, and even more to blog about but i need to vent.. or i wun be able to sleep tonight]
It was a late day today cos we left the hospital at 5, partly because we spend alot of time looking for patients who weren't there or were sleeping and partly because we spent one hour chatting in starbucks, waiting for Wk and Mt (i'll leave it to Wk to tell u why the queue was one hour long). Then after tat i had to meet Catechol at Raffles to WALK to Central. (btw i think e muratama ramen there is over-rated but i still wanna go try the other flavours, who wants to go with me? Cos i think Catechol dun wanna go there ever again) Then after shopping around there i had to walk to City hall mrt, so all in all it is Very Tiring day.

Some time ago, my dad told me to go see some TCM for my eczema, but i was too stressed (or PMS-y) so i told him very impatiently “NO'. Then he got POed with me for a few days, so when he asked again yesterday and said tt he already made appointment, i very grudgingly agreed. Little did i know what i got myself into. Cos all along i assume (along w all other folks of the younger generation) that TCM should be in Chinatown, i only found out today at 7.30pm the venue, when my mum told me to meet at 8.30pm at BEDOK mrt.. And still must take bus some more lor after tat..

It's at some ulu HDB flat, and when he (a guy in his late 30s who speaks with a pseudo cheena accent) opened the door, the place is horribly sparse, like those gangster hideouts in hongkong movies where the gangsters can pack all their belongings (and evidence) in 3seconds. Right in front of the door, is a table, and this is where the consultation takes place. And right next to this is the living room, which is empty save for some wooden chairs. [I know this is the waiting area because halfway thru our consultation, some patient rang the doorbell and walked into the waiting room. So you can imagine that there is NO patient confidentiality becos everyone can see and hear EVERYTHING tht's happening.]

Anyway, the TCM guy didn't even introduce himself to me, i'm sure of this becos i was waiting for his intro cos i wondered if he would intro himself as X-dai4fu1. The first thing he said was (everything in Chinese) “Mr Lee, when did you last come?”
Then, he took out this exercise book (the ones we practiced xi2 zi4 in pri sch) which records ALL of his patient's details and flipped to the corresponding date, where a few sentences of my dad's hx was written.

Here's a short summary of my version of his hx: My dad, 54yo Chinese gentleman, pmh: IHD defaulted tx, HPT, HCT on meds, presented with many mths hx of L knee pain, dull, mechanical. Saw a no. of doctors, last one was recommended by his fren and guess wat! He's Prof James Hui! [teeheehee so amusing.. but at least Prof's sense of humour put my dad at ease.. must remind me to tell u guys abt the joke he said], he dx OA 2o to old implant, and from wat my dad said, i think he wanted to do some surgery similar to TKR. And my dad defaulted f/u. This was made worse when he suddenly presented with acute L knee pain and swelling, which i think was a torn meniscus. So i told him bandage and bed rest. And of cos he cannot sit still and dragged me to go A&E with him, and after tt he went to see the TCM guy i'm talking abt. He said he felt better after the TCM meds but that could also be due to the swelling going off.

Anyway, so during this visit, the daifu started to take the typical pain hx and asked abt the knee giving way, so i tot at least he knows his stuff. But then he started to ask some weird unrelated questions like “does your feet feel cold” and “is there numbness in your toes”. Then he ba mai (feel the pulse) and wah the way he feel very cool leh.
With three fingers alternately tapping on the wrist. Like he very impatient liddat. Apparently the meds he gave for the knee pain is also treating my dad's other co-morbidities. Cos he said that the meds change his pulse from heavy to floating (i recall da chang jing mention smth like this) which means the blood can flow better. Kinda like antiplatelet therapy, i tot. Anyway, he also said alot of other things tat doesnt make sense to me, so i dun remember them.

When it was my turn, i told him a good complete hx abt my eczema. And i told him abt all the tx i went thru, and my dad took out this other TCM prescription that he's been forcing me to drink. This was when the daifu looked extremely peeved and kept staring at the presciption but not saying anything. So i told him that even though i felt that the TCM helped, it is actually the NSC tx that relieves the pruritus. He ignored me, then said something abt my blood being very toxic and 're' and then smiled and exclaimed very loudly that the meds only made my blood less 're' and it is the NSC that relieved the pruritus (err hello didn't i just told you that?) and then tossed the prescription aside.

Then, he ba my mai.. and this was when the fun(ny) began.
He asked if there's any problem with my lungs. So i thought he was asking abt asthma or AR and said no. But a cough chose that moment to escape from my mouth, and my dad quickly said that i get coughs and colds very easily. I wanted to say that i hardly ever got sick before i started taking steroids, but the daifu shouted loudly “that's lung problem!!”.
He said my eczema pulse is very strong as it obliterated my cough and sore throat pulse, so my eczema problem is very strong (i tried hard to keep a straight face from then onwards. It didn't help with my mum next to me saying, “wah very strong ah. Aiyo tsk tsk tsk”)

Then he asked, “you have never gotten chicken pox right.”
And i said, “yes i did, and quite recently too.” Then he asked me, “is it very serious and how many days the pox last” and i told him it wasn't very serious at all, there was hardly any itch.

He asked, “do you feel lightheaded most of the time?” I said, “no. i get headaches”. And he asked, “do you get headaches only when your body feel hot?” I thought, errr hot???? But decided to give him face by saying “yes, sometimes when the weather is hot.”

So far, my wrist has been in hyperextended position for 15minutes, so i'm getting some numbness along the distribution of the median nerve and when he released my wrist to ba3 my other wrist, i had to fling it around (really like how the textbook say leh).

And he hurriedly ask, “just now when i ba3 your mai4, did you feel numbness?” And of course i had to say yes. He said, “yar, i know because just now when i felt your pulse, it jumped abit for awhile, and i couldn't feel it for a moment”. I stared at him alarmed and thought, Wah! Siao liao! AF ah?! (my mum muttered, “no pulse! Aiyo!!”)
Then, he asked if i my toes got overlap each other (hammer toe????) or got spread apart (splayed foot???) before. (Like huh?? where the hell did that come from?)

Then he asked if i feel very 'heavy' and tired and 'out of sorts' if i didn't get enuf sleep. I wanted to say DUH. But decided to say simply, “yes.”

And everytime i replied one of his questions, he would nod and am4 chio3 to himself like he could predict my answers liddat.. Where got doctors smile to themselves when patients tell them symptoms one.. it just about contradicts every rule in our COFM notes...

Along the way, my dad told him about how they were told by the Western doctors that our dirty house and dog is to blame, and the dai4fu1 actually agreed with him. But he also said, “actually not only the dog, all the air we breathe is very dirty, so getting rid of the dog wun be much help. [ok, at least he saved my dog's life] It's because your lungs are very weak, that's why you cannot deal with the dirty air.”

Finally, in the end, he concluded that i have weak lungs and liver and need to improve them, and when i specifically asked him if doing this can help my eczema, he said very emphatically that every 10% improvement in my lungs and liver's health will result in a 10% improvement in my eczema. (so scientific eh?)

It's just so amusing and unbelievable and totally at odds with everything we've learnt in the past 4 years that i almost want to have a crash course in TCM just so i can make head or tail of it. I didn't attempt to ask him the rationale behind his questions because, well, where do you even begin???

He then stood up abruptly and went into his pharmacy and i saw him take out alot of glass bottles containing black liquid and he just started mixing them all into the standard plastic bottles our GPs use.

I have nodded at opportune moments, laughed at his lame jokes, answered his questions politely and without laughing, looked helpless at times, and now i can ask him the question I need to find out.

First i asked him very 'concernedly' if i can take his medicine when i'm sick. He said yes, but i have to take flu meds with it. Then, he started telling us some stories abt his training in China, and just as we're about to leave, i looked him straight in the eye and asked if there are any steroids in the medicine he gave me. And he became very jovial and laughed and hemmed and hawed and said he must not answer my question. And then told me to get rid of my mindset (in English some more leh) and don't get affected by what Western medicine had said abt TCM. I just kept staring at him, so he asked jokingly, “you think if TCM contains steroids it will still cost $20 meh?”

I think i looked abit doubtful and unbelievingly then (isn't prednisolone very cheap?), because he just suddenly said, “TCM never contain steroids one! Ah hahaha, i say cannot tell you, in the end i still say. haha”.

Oh-kay.

Finally, right at the door, i gave him a stern look and said, “you are quite sure that this meds don't contain steroids right. Cause i'm not able to take steroids.” That was when he went rather still for a moment and asked “what happens when you take steroids?”
So i purple-ly told a half-truth, “oh i'm not allowed to take anymore cos i overdosed on it already.” And he hurriedly said, “just call me if you notice any side effect and i will tell you what to do.”

Bah!

I am never going back to that patronizing supercilious ?lying git again.

The only good thing he did was at least he got my dad to stop drinking (for 10days).